“Who will marry such a fat girl?” I catch myself thinking. For me, marriage isn’t just a union of two souls but an unwelcome spotlight on my body. From relatives sliding into my room to whisper, “You need to lose weight; otherwise, no one will marry you,” to bridal stores indirectly with their eye movement emphasizing that their gowns weren’t made for bodies like mine, the message is soul-crushing: You’re not enough as you are. Sometimes a person’s eye movement conveys a message more potent than words ever can.
The societal pressures were so intense that I would remember scouring the Internet for ways to get thin in a week, contemplating risky surgeries and extreme diet regimens.
Each “no” from a boy made me feel even more inferior. The thought that my weight could outweigh my qualities, accomplishments, and the love I have to offer, made me really sad.
But one day I sat back and thought: why am I doing this? Am I trying to fit into someone else’s idea of a perfect spouse? Sometimes, people make marriage sound like a business deal where your body size is on the table for negotiation. This is a sign that something isn’t right. Everyone deserves to feel worthy of love, just the way they are. Your value isn’t tied to your body size. You are so much more than that. You have unique experiences, dreams, talents, and a heart full of love to offer. Remember one thing that love goes way beyond the physical.
