Teresa Valley: The Visionary Behind Be Kind Five
Teresa:
Yes, my name is Teresa Valley. I’m the Executive Director and founder of Be Kind Five, a nonprofit based in Washington state.
Arushi:
In your experience, have you had any negative experiences with body image? And if not, have you noticed loved ones in your life facing similar challenges?
Teresa:
Yes, I can only speak to my own experience, but growing up, I was always a late bloomer. I was small for my age, very slender, and it was often pointed out to me that my body wasn’t “normal.” I’ve always felt like people made me feel like something was wrong with me.
Arushi:
Yeah.
Teresa:
It was hard, but I was an athlete at a young age, particularly in soccer. I was the smallest player on the team, but I was always the strongest. My coaches would say, “She was our secret weapon,” because no one could believe that such a small person could kick the ball so far and be so skilled. Despite being called names like “skinny” and other unkind comments, I was determined to prove I was strong and capable.
Arushi:
Yes.
Teresa:
This started at a young age, and it made me view myself differently. It’s sad that we internalize those messages, so when I raised my daughter, I made sure to teach her that it was normal for her to be built the way she is. I told her it was about genetics and that she would continue to grow and blossom. I also made sure she could come to me if anyone said anything hurtful so we could talk about it.
Arushi:
Yeah, yeah.
Teresa:
I didn’t want her to feel the way I did, and I always told her not to point out others’ bodies, whether the comment was positive or not. When I was young, I was also told my ears were too big, just another thing to make me feel self-conscious. So, I made it clear to my daughter that everyone is different, and pointing out others’ differences isn’t a nice thing to do.
Arushi:
Yeah, exactly. I really like how you mentioned that you always tried to teach your daughter not to comment on other people’s bodies, regardless of whether it was meant to be positive or not. I think a lot of the time, something we say might come off differently than how we intend it.
Teresa:
Exactly.
Arushi:
Right, it’s important to be mindful of how our words can affect others, even when we don’t mean harm.
Teresa:
Right, I mean, anything we say about someone might not be how they feel about it. It’s unnecessary to point out physical features. Saying things like, “You have a big heart, you’re kind, you’re generous,” that’s beautiful to say. But when it comes to physical appearances, it’s just not necessary and can create unnecessary drama. This can lead to big mental health issues for a person.
Arushi:
Yeah, exactly. So, what inspired you to establish Be Kind Five, and how has the organization’s mission evolved since it started?
Teresa:
Be Kind Five started in 2009 when I decided to enter the nonprofit sector. Originally, the name of our organization was Girls Giving Back, which my daughter helped create. It made sense because we were doing a lot of giving back, and girls were mainly running the show. However, as time went on, I felt the name didn’t fully reflect our mission, and in 2019, I realized the importance of creating a program focused on prevention and empowerment.
The idea behind Be Kind Five is to focus on five key areas in life—mental health, giving back, taking care of the planet, taking care of our bodies, and financial health. I wanted to create a space where people could access resources that would help prevent crises like homelessness, and also be empowered to take care of themselves and each other.
Arushi:
Yeah.
Teresa:
I wanted it to be a resource hub where people could find support and know what’s available to them. People often don’t know where to go for help, and Be Kind Five is about creating connections and making people aware of the resources they can turn to, whether it’s for themselves or someone they care about. We’ve been working with shelters, but I wanted to create something that could be a partnership across communities, bringing people together to learn and grow.
Arushi:
That’s amazing. I really love how you’ve tied everything together, especially the five pillars. It’s so meaningful.
Teresa:
Thank you! The five pillars are really at the core of what we do. Mental health is the first pillar because I believe it’s foundational to everything else. If we don’t have access to emotional support or tools to manage our emotions, it’s harder to thrive in other areas. The second pillar is giving back, which has been a big part of my journey—being able to support the community and connect with like-minded people.
Arushi:
Yes, definitely.
Teresa:
The third pillar is the planet—taking care of the earth is something I’m passionate about. There are so many amazing nonprofits doing great work in this area, and it’s important for people to know about them and find ways to contribute.
Arushi:
Yeah, absolutely.
Teresa:
The fourth pillar is taking care of our bodies—keeping active and appreciating what our bodies do for us. It’s not just about appearance, but about feeling good and nurturing ourselves. Whether it’s going for a walk, dancing to your favorite song, or whatever feels good, it’s about movement that connects us to ourselves.
Arushi:
Yeah, I love that approach.
Teresa:
Exactly. The final pillar is financial health—learning how to manage and grow our money. It’s something a lot of people don’t have access to or understand, and I think it’s so important to feel confident in managing finances. At Be Kind Five, we also teach entrepreneurship skills to empower people to start small businesses or side hustles.
Arushi:
That’s such an important skill, especially in today’s world.
Teresa:
It is! It’s about building confidence and knowing that you can take care of yourself financially, whether you’re working for someone else or running your own business.
Arushi:
I love how versatile and comprehensive the five pillars are. It really covers all aspects of life.
Teresa:
Yes, and the beauty of it is that everyone can explore these pillars at their own pace. It’s not about a rigid structure or classroom assignments—it’s about learning in a way that feels good and empowering. I love seeing people feel excited about learning new things, and I want Be Kind Five to be a warm space where people can come and feel welcomed.
Arushi:
Yeah, that’s such a great approach. And I really appreciate how you’ve connected everything to self-love and positivity. It’s so important for people to learn to love themselves.
Teresa:
Exactly! I think self-love is essential, and I hope Be Kind Five can be a space where people can start that journey, feel supported, and grow in ways they hadn’t expected.
Arushi:
That’s such a beautiful message. Thank you so much for sharing all of that.
Teresa:
Thanks for listening!
Jennifer Luo: Philosophy professor at Seattle university
Chinese Philosophy & Body Image
Here’s the corrected and polished transcription, with Tanishka as the interviewer and Jennifer Luo being interviewed: